Wise parents don’t rescue kids from their mistakes

When children get themselves in a bind, whether it’s forgotten homework, a lost permission slip, a left-behind lunch, or something more serious, parents usually have a strong urge to solve the problem for their child. The parent swoops in to save the day, and the problem is gone. But the child just learned that my parent will solve my problems for me, and that problems aren’t really that uncomfortable. They missed a chance to learn that actions have consequences.

Self-confidence, responsibility, character, and resiliency all find their foundation in the same place. They grow out of the opportunities children create when they make poor decisions and are faced with the consequences that follow.

Wise parents over-ride their own natural tendencies to rescue or to tell kids how to deal with these opportunities. If they don’t, the opportunities are lost. Over a period of time, youngsters start to believe that others are smarter and more capable than they are.

Jake called his dad from college to say that his car had been towed. He tried to explain that it wasn’t his fault because the parking sign was not easy to see.

Dad replied, “Oh, that is sad. What do you think you are going to do?”

“Well, Dad, I was thinking you need to send me $200 so I can get the car out of the impound lot.”

Wise parents don’t rescue kids from their mistakes

Keep reading to find out how Dad responded.

Originally posted 2015-11-11 10:23:34. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

How to get others to listen to you

It’s not too rare in 4th and 5th grade to come upon some students that are having a bad time and really wish other people knew about it. This usually involves the students talking, discussing, arguing, shouting, yelling, or name-calling in an effort to express their feelings.

What we adults know is that that method usually creates more problems than it solves. But we also know that even adults are tempted to speak harshly or lash out when we feel we have been wronged.

Love and Logic has a great, simple suggestion for boosting the chance that other people will listen to you. Phrase your concern like this:

“I’d like to share what I’ve been hearing and get your thoughts.”

This method gets the concern discussed without putting anyone on the hot seat. No one feels defensive, so the topic will get discussed and probably resolved.

This would probably solve a lot of problems for people that go to elementary school, or for anyone that has ever attended one.

The rest of the article is worth a read.

Originally posted 2018-09-06 17:22:58. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

The time is right

Originally posted 2018-02-19 13:55:39. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

How to help with bullying

Source

Originally posted 2017-05-24 16:58:49. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

How to stop arguing with your kids

Judy saved her own life. She used to listen when her kids argued with her. She used to fall for their manipulation. When her teen daughter said, “You love Billy more than me!” she used to get upset and insist, “That’s not true! I love you BOTH!”

Now she takes better care of herself. When the arguing and manipulation start, Judy goes brain dead. She doesn’t listen to the words lest she be tempted to do something dumb – like respond.

Originally posted 2011-09-14 16:22:02. Republished by Blog Post Promoter