Category Archive for 'Parent Tips'

How to help your student get started on work

Thursday, January 13th, 2022

Some students struggle with getting started on homework or other work at home. It can become a battle of wills or a temptation to issue threats and assert control. Love and Logic suggests looking for ways to share control and give choices, before things get difficult:

  • Will you be starting your schoolwork now or in five minutes?
  • What do you want to start with? Math or reading?
  • Do you want to make a goal of working for 30 minutes before your break, or would 25 minutes be better?
  • Will you be doing your work while sitting or standing?
  • Do you think it would be best to draft something on pencil or paper… or begin your work directly on the computer?
  • Would you like my help or would you prefer working alone?
  • Do you want to learn in the kitchen or in the family room?
  • Will you be working while keeping your body still, or would you rather see how much you can wiggle while still getting it done?
  • Should we start with the hardest part first or the easiest?
  • Would you rather help me with chores or get started on your schoolwork?

The key to success with this technique involves remembering three things:

  1. Give most of your choices before your child becomes resistant… not after.
  2. With each choice provide two options, each of which you like.
  3. Be prepared to choose for your child if they don’t select an option you provided.

Read the rest of the article here.

Originally posted 2020-04-20 09:44:47. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

When Kids Struggle with Reading

Thursday, January 6th, 2022

How can I help my struggling reader? How can I get my child to love reading? These are questions that are asked over and over by caring parents that want to help their students to become successful readers.

Reading for at least 20 minutes a night is the standard advice, and it’s a good habit for students to develop. But what if they read out of duty or grudgingly? Love and Logic has a simple suggestion below that still applies in 4th grade and beyond:

After a difficult and frustrating day at work, don’t you wish your spouse would greet you with the following?

Honey, I got an email from your boss. She says that you haven’t been working up to your potential. She also mentioned that your reading is really poor and that you’ve had a bad attitude about completing your projects. That’s why we are going to sit down together and work on some practice samples. Now…I’m only doing this because I love you.

My guess is that few readers would vote for this treatment as an effective way of promoting deeper marital intimacy and improved work performance!

Far too many children struggle all day long with reading…and other subjects. Then they face even more frustration when they get home. When this happens, their reading performance rarely increases, but their disdain for books does!

May I suggest another approach? What if this strategy saved your relationship with your child AND helped him or her develop a much better vocabulary, understanding of language structure, and attitude toward reading?

Read to them, and have fun doing it. Do this even if they’re in high school! Do it as often as possible. Don’t stand over them and force them to read. Don’t nitpick their reading performance. Just enjoy your time together as you read…to them. Take the pressure off!

Read the rest here.

Originally posted 2014-03-15 12:35:27. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

Praise Junkies?

Thursday, December 30th, 2021

How much praise I offer, and for what, is a subject that I have to deal with a lot in class. Below is a quiz from Love and Logic to shed some light on the issue of praise in your home.

Take the following quiz to see whether you are creating responsibly independent kids…or praiseaholics:

  1. When my kids succeed on a task, I recognize their effort and their good feelings…rather than telling them how happy it makes me.
  2. I demonstrate that I love them, even when I don’t necessarily love their behavior.
  3. I allow my kids to see me resisting peer pressure…rather than always trying to project a perfect image.
  4. I provide praise rarely…and only when they have done something truly praiseworthy.
  5. My kids often overhear me talking about how I make my decisions based on my own beliefs…rather than seeing me make decisions based on what “everybody else is doing.”
  6. I allow my kids to make affordable mistakes and learn from them…rather than constantly telling them what to do.

The more “yes” answers you gave, the more likely your kids will learn to resist peer pressure and lead lives where their happiness is based on doing the right thing rather than trying to please everyone.

Here’s the rest of the article.

Originally posted 2014-03-13 16:34:13. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

5 ideas for motivating boys

Thursday, December 23rd, 2021

All Pro Dad has a good article about motivating boys at school and home. If you have a boy that sometimes needs a little “kickstart” to work on homework, chores, or responsibilities, here are some ideas:

1. Treat boys like boys.

2. Bring Back Recess.

3. Make sure they’re thirsty.

4. Encourage.

5. Take the Goodies out of His Room.

Read the rest of the article for an explanation of each point.

Originally posted 2014-01-21 09:10:38. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

Paying for misbehavior

Thursday, December 16th, 2021

Love and Logic tells the interesting story of a child that saved up money received from his grandma. His parents helped him use the value of a dollar to learn the value of good behavior:

Money wasn’t the only thing he saved. He also stored up lots of energy for when Mom and Dad went out. In fact, so much energy that he wore out every babysitter in town.

Mom finally convinced a sitter to work with her to help Junior realize the error of his ways. The deal: If he was good, Mom and Dad would pay for the sitter. If he wasn’t, he paid. This got his attention.

And I bet you can imagine how the next babysitting session went!

Love and Logic suggests using natural consequences like this to teach responsibility. You might be able to find several places you could use this in your family:

  • Parents pay for good dentist visits, and children pay for the bad ones if their cavities are caused by not being responsible to brush their teeth.
  • Parents pay students to complete some chores (Dave Ramsey says to call this a commission, not an allowance). What if they don’t do the chores? They don’t get paid. Maybe they even pay their parent or sibling to do the chore that they were supposed to do.

What about paying for grades? People disagree about if parents should do this, with some saying paying for grades is like adults getting paid for work. That’s close, but adults are paid for hours worked, not usually on the results of a certain product. So you probably shouldn’t pay for grades.

But if you’ve already started or committed to paying for grades, research shows that if you stop, your student will likely not work as hard for their grades. So you might need to continue for a while, and if you do, this Love and Logic tip might apply. Parents pay for the good grades, and students pay for the bad ones, especially if you have evidence (missing assignments, students not doing their daily homework time, arguments) that they didn’t try their hardest.

Again, paying for grades should not be your top way to motivate your student. If you don’t pay for grades, don’t start now. But if you do, try the tip from this article. And certainly with other areas of your student’s responsibility, look for ways that a student’s greedy little heart for cash can teach them that their actions have consequences.

 

Originally posted 2016-10-03 06:18:15. Republished by Blog Post Promoter