A simple way to boost responsibility

File:2010-07-20 Black windup alarm clock face.jpgResponsibility is something on the mind of both parents and students. Parents want their students to be more responsible, and students are always asking for more options to make their own choices and take charge of their life more.

One simple tool can help both parents and students: an alarm clock.

This isn’t earth shattering! Get your student their own alarm clock and have them manage it, setting it for the appropriate time in the morning to take up. It’s a great way to teach responsibility. Maybe they’ll even forget to set it one time and you can teach them the consequences. Mistakes are a good teacher and right now the consequences are a lot smaller than oversleeping for work one day.

Parents, don’t be the alarm clock! This is an area your student can grow responsibility in. And while you’re at it, make sure your student’s bedtime and wake up time is allowing them 10 hours of sleep a night or so. This will give your student the brainpower they need to focus and learn through the day. We all know how it feels to try to get work done when we are feeling groggy.

Originally posted 2018-09-12 16:55:59. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

How to avoid power struggles with stubborn kids

When kids get stubborn, adults are tempted to turn up the heat by making demands, raising voices, making threats, and showing we mean business. To stubborn kids, that’s a challenge they would love to take you up on.

To reduce the chance of a power struggle, here’s a Love and Logic tip:

1. Approach slowly as if you haven’t a care in the world.
2. Ask nicely, “Will you ______________, just for me? Thanks!”
3. Act cool, turn tail, and slowly walk away.

Research has demonstrated that the odds of getting into a nasty power struggle with a kid dramatically decrease when we’re no longer around them. The true science has to do with expectations and the fact that people will live up to…or down to…the ones we communicate. What expectation do we send when we ask someone to do something and then stare at them? The message is clear: “You’re not going to do this for me.”

In contrast, what expectation is sent when we make the very same request yet move away? The message is far more positive: “This is a win-win situation. I know you’ll help me out.”

Read the rest here.

Originally posted 2016-01-27 17:06:51. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

When kids say, “I’m stupid”

There are few things that tear at our hearts more than hearing our kids say, “I’m stupid.”

At first glance the following parent seems to be right on track:

No you are not stupid. Honey, think of all of the things you are good at. How about reading? You’re good at that! And, remember how much you improved in baseball last summer. Stupid kids don’t learn how to hit curve balls like you did. And your art is wonderful. If you were dumb, would you have been able to learn how to create those drawings with such wonderful three-dimensional perspectives? I don’t think so.

At second glance, we realize that this well-meaning parent is actually lending credibility to their child’s “I’m stupid” remark… by spending so much time and energy addressing it.

The Love and Logic approach is much simpler…just ask your student, “Aren’t you glad that I don’t believe that?”

The same response is fitting when a student says, “I can’t do this.” Rather than trying to convince the student that they are wrong, just ask the student, “Aren’t you glad I don’t believe you?” Said with a positive voice and a smile, a student has no choice but to agree with you!

Read more about how to handle these types of negative comments.

Originally posted 2013-10-11 16:53:16. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

React vs. Respond

The American College of Pediatricians has a good article about the difference between reacting versus responsding to kids.

Reacting means that you meet your child’s emotionally-charged behavior with your own emotionally-charged reply. Responding, on the other hand, gives your child permission to express their big emotions, ideas and feelings without criticism, shame or guilt.”

Read the rest here.

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Originally posted 2016-04-11 19:47:00. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

Don’t quit

Originally posted 2017-01-21 07:07:27. Republished by Blog Post Promoter